Critique my query PLEASE

I have just posted my query on the blog so that any of you who are willing to give your honest opinion and critique on it will do so.
I ask that you please leave a comment and tell me what is good in the query and what needs to be changed.  I would like to get other writers' thoughts on my query before I begin querying agents once more.  If you have some free time I beg of you to read over my query and tell me what you think.
(I may also post up my synopsis soon if anyone is willing to read that).
THANKS to anyone who reads it and leaves feedback.  Please do not be afraid to tell me that something is wrong in the query because I want to know.  Thank you all!